Saturday, December 10, 2011

The Annual Christmas Tree Divorce Day


Today is Christmas Tree shopping day.  For most American families, this would normally constitute as a lovely clan experience; however, for my brood it always turns into the most argumentative and disruptive day of the year.  Then why, you - my friends and blog readers ask - don't we simply purchase a fake tree and prevent this annual nightmare experience?  Because my husband and I are suckers for tradition, that's why.  It wouldn't be the holiday season without our sons arguing in the backseat about leaving their Gameboys at home or my beloved and I "discussing" which tree stand to use.  Oh, the tree stand...this has been a thorn in my side for sixteen years.

You see, we have two Christmas Tree stands.  One, a cheap, plastic piece of crap which Eric, my beloved, feels is the best possible stand to use.  It is circular and for the last several seasons solely responsible for several fallen trees and many broken ornaments.  The other, a heavy, metal one - the one I prefer we use - Eric dislikes and tends to sabotage when he places the tree in it.  When I say sabotage, I mean that he never seems to tighten the bolts into the tree base strong enough and amazingly, we have a Christmas Tree disaster.  This seems to always prove his point that the other piece of crap stand should have been used.  Hmmm...isn't that convenient???  

This day is the one day of the year which tests the mettle of our marriage - that if we were ever to consider divorce, today would be that day.  If I don't post a blog tomorrow, I'm either looking for a good lawyer or Eric and I have strangled each other with strings of ancient, tangled Christmas Tree lights.

And, by the way, my tree stand is the one we're going to use this year.  That's all I'm going to blog about that.

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