Tuesday, July 26, 2011

When did coffee machines get so complicated?

When did waiting room coffee machines become so friggin' complicated?

There was a day, and I remember this day, when it was a simple 2-pot coffee pot system.  One pot was black for regular coffee.  The other was orange for decaffeinated.  Then, if the waiting room were really snazzy, they would have a pot with hot water for the tea drinkers of the world.

Here I was today, standing in front of the most complicated coffee doohickey machine I have ever encountered in a waiting room.  I was so distraught by the sight of it, I attempted my first cup of joe without noticing the directions staring me straight in the face on the cabinet in front of me.  All I can say about this is thank goodness the only other person in the large waiting room besides my son, Austynn, was sitting against the non-coffee machine facing wall.  And Austynn, wheew!  He was too busy playing his Gameboy to notice the flustered look on his mother's face while nasty looking water dribbled into my cup during my first attempt.

Ok, I looked at the directions.  I looked again.  I searched for instructions for the directions.  No luck.  Concentrate, Bri!  I believe it's in English.  Clean your glasses!  Pick a coffee cube?  What the..?  It looked like a creamer.  Whatever!  Ok, which one?  Strong?  Strong is good.  Obviously my brain cannot translate English this morning.  Is there extra bold strong?

"Mom, are you ok?  You're mumbling to yourself?"

Great. How loud did he have to yell that?!  "I'm good Austynn, thanks."

Do you need help?

Oh geez, here we go..."No buddy, I've got it covered.  Just play your game, please."

"Really, Mom.  You look confused, I can..."

"AUSTYNN!"

(quiet giggling coming from the front desk employees)

Stick the coffee cube where?  It looks like it goes here..ooooh, that's cool.  Well, how big of a cup is this?  8oz or 10oz?  If I say 10oz it might overflow.  What the Hell, I'll choose 10oz.  It wouldn't give me the option if it wasn't an option, right?  Stop, stop, STOP!  I KNEW IT!  "What a FRIGGIN' mess..."

"I told you, Mom."

"Be quiet, Austynn."

"Mom?"

"Yes?"  At this point I am clearly annoyed and wiping up coffee and powdered coffee creamer from the counter and waiting room floor.

"Can I have a cup of coffee too?"

Arrgghh!

1 comment:

magi said...

Oh my God, you mad freak! That's brilliant!

Coffee Equipment