Thursday, April 21, 2011

My Bleepin' Whozamacallit is a Wazzin

Before I begin, I must add the following disclaimers:
  1. If you are younger than eighteen years of age, please get your parents permission prior to reading the following blog. 
  2. If you have a weak stomach, you may want to reconsider reading any further.
  3. Remember, I tend to be irreverent and sometimes sexual in nature.  
Now you, my friends and adult blog followers, will crawl into the deep recesses of my warped and sometimes naughty mind.  Let me further add that some of these words and catch phrases I can not take full credit for.  They have morphed over the years from normal words into well, hmmm...you'll see.  Also, Eric, my husband, friend, and soul mate, is not the mild-mannered, polite, young man his doting mother-in-law thought she knew over the years.  He's actually quite bizarre and has a crude sense of humor (which are a couple of reasons why I love him so much).  To spare him any embarrassment, I will not share which of the idioms below he can take credit for, though some of you can make a fairly good assumption and probably be right.

  • Snot Waggle:  A nasty thing which hangs in the back of my throat when I have a sinus infection.  When it is eventually blown into a "Snot Rag" (tissue) it seems to go on forever but when finished it is indeed a moment for celebration.
  • Jackinuzzi:  Pretty much a Jacuzzi but without need for further explanation. 
  • Discomboobilated:  One of my personal favorites.  I use it instead of "Discombobulated " so often with strangers that they think I'm a total idiot and don't know any better.
  • Tankus Poopis and Tootis Peepis:  Nicknames for our dogs and really stupid ones at that.
  • Fart Mongar:  I suppose this started out as Fart Mongul but morphed into another entirely ridiculous family term.  Again, I don't believe there is need for an explanation; however, William holds the current title.

 I'm thinking perhaps that's all you can handle at this time.  And gentlemen, please do not "up chuck chuckie" any "loogies" today because Breezy finds them absolutely "disgusto mundo"!

2 comments:

Leigh Ann said...

I love 'snot waggle'! We currently 'hock up lung cookies' that we deposit into our 'snot rag' as well!
Jackincuzzi...I used to get teased w/Jacuzzi for my maiden name...this takes it to a whole different level!
I also married a rather crazy, crude boy...he knocks it up to havin' been in the Navy:
'Prairie Doggin''...what Ron calls when he has to 'GO NOW'.
'Takin' a Gamble', Ron's term for takin' a chance on what could be a 'shart'.
'JackKnob' & 'Douchewaffle'...his current words for idiots on the road.
I could go on, but most of us can only handle so much 'color' a day...

Bri Potts said...

I am lovin' your husband Leigh Ann and I have never met the guy. He will always have "refrigerator rights" in my home! ROFL!!!

"Douchwaffle" Perfection on a platter. This will be served from my mouth at the next crappy Denver driver I encounter!